The Eighth Page

Upper Management

James P. Sawabini is the Editor-in-Chief of the CXXX Phillipian Editorial Board. He said he enjoyed sleep Lower year, and that he’d had enough of it. Executive Editor Thomas J.C. Smyth is generally accepted as the happiest person on the CXXX board for two reasons: his southern drawl and the fact that he has two middle initials. While his position entails no actual decision-making capabilities, he is admittedly excited to have the word “Executive” before his name on the masthead. It makes him feel like he’s the president. Also, he is eloquent. New Director Katherine L. Chen is the epitome of a devoted journalist and solid writer. However, she has risen from very shaky beginnings as a member of the News section. In her early days as a writer, she was known to call the newsroom after being assigned a story to ask if she “really had to interview all those people.” She also frequently sent in 800 character articles when 800 words were asked of her. Needless to say, she was the clear choice for News Director. Steven J. Bartz, Managing Editor and resident ladies’ man, has set a new precedent as the first known associate from the Features Section to become a member of Upper Management. There is a glimmer of hope in the eyes of all Humor writers this week as they realize that their dreams of having a leadership position at The Phillipian are no longer guaranteed to be completely and utterly crushed. The new Upper Management is looking forward to spending hours upon hours in the newsroom, doing such fun tasks as: standing around, looking at other people working, talking about other people working, telling other people that they should be working, and complaining about how little sleep they get because they have been working. –Elinor Garcia-Garcia & Conor McKinnon