Commentary

Becky’s Halloween Special

Halloween is a crazy day in the calendar when you can get a psychopath sugar high and freak people out simply by walking behind them past sundown. You can wear a bathing suit in 40 degree weather and justify it as your contribution to the Malibu Barbie Theme you and your girls are doing. You can go beyond your popped polo and be someone you’re normally not. You can remember the good old days, when you ran up your neighbors’ stairs and screamed “Trick or Treat!!” in hopes that they weren’t the annoying people who gave out old-lady caramel chews or even worse, a toothbrush. Halloween is awesome, and it’s just around the corner. In these upcoming weeks, students across the nation will consider a weighty subject: what to dress up as on October 31st. Of course there are the kids who are “too cool” for Halloween and don’t take the effort to create a costume (although they really want to deep down, we all know it…), and the ones who are too nervous to dress up because they don’t dare risk the chance of not having a trendy one. Then you have the occasional groups who HAVE to dress up with the same theme. God forbid each has a unique costume. (I don’t know why this thought came into my brain right now but just as a little side note: Halloween is officially the day that girls can dress like skanks and get away with it. Did you ever notice how as we got older, costumes consisted of less and less clothing? I’m not saying it’s a bad thing (I don’t exactly sport a turtle neck and sweats on Oct. 31st) but it’s just an acknowledged truth I would like to point out.)The reason for these clannish costume cults is clear: first of all, if and when people make fun of their stripper-fire-girl outfits, they have the other three in their clique to cry with. Also, if you’re not decked out with the matching hats and cute boots, they and everyone else knows you aren’t part of their crew. Year after year, there are always the same costumes. You’ve got the “Scream” or gross bloody mask that can suffocate someone to death if he doesn’t come out for air every minute or so (then they wouldn’t even need a mask because they’d be dead for real). You’ve got the traditional dead-bride-witch-ghost-thingy, a costume that is timeless and yet every year even more disturbing than the past. You’ve got the cutsie kids who dress with poodle skirts or wear pajamas and carry a bottle around as a baby. You’ll always see the occasional hippy, a politician mask, and a big round M & M (white gloves and all). As for me, I’ve grown up wearing traditional American Girl costumes. Yet, as I got older, my costume choice got less conventional and more uh hmm, boring and weird. I was a black cat when I was seven years old. It was a full-fledged jumpsuit, like those feety pajamas our parents used to zip us into. It had a tail, and a hood that had ears. I had black gloves and black shoes. Whiskers were drawn on my face and I practiced my “Meow” for the entire month of October to perfect it for the night when I had to suck up to the folks passing out the candy. Then I was a witch, a cheerleader, Cinderella, a Power Ranger (yea, the pink one), a football player, a doctor, a dentist (I was lacking in the creativity department that year…pretty much wore the same thing, just told people that I was a dentist instead), a football player again (I liked the black stuff I put under my eyes, even though it ended up all over my face by the end of the day because I kept forgetting it was there), slacked off and wore a black shirt with a skull thing on it, and then last year I was someone from the ‘80s with a bunch of my friends (what the hell?!). Can you imagine the previous people at a party together? The Power Ranger would be kicking over the punch bowl while the football player hit on Cinderella. The hippie would be doing illegal substances in the back corner while the doctor and dentist chatted up about life in the medical field. The witch would be exchanging make-up tips with the cheerleader and the 1980’s teen would hide the black cat in her hair (it wasn’t quite big enough yet, her fro could use a little more teasing). Idea: next time you’re bored in math, think of all the things you have dressed up as for Halloween and imagine them all on a deserted island, or Survivor, or American Idol, okay maybe that’s pushing it a little, but honestly, it’s hilarious. I must admit, I’m pretty pumped for Halloween at P.A, considering it’s my first year here. I’m assuming my speculations about the holiday aren’t too far from the truth, and I anticipate seeing the traditional costumes, along with the cliquey ones, and the risqué ones (to say the least)…it’s inevitable. Get thinking about your costume, and don’t be “too cool” to dress up. Oh yea, if anyone wants to borrow any of my previous costumes, just let me know…the Pink Power Ranger suit is wicked (get it??) hot.