The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Week’s Top Headlines

Olympic Athletes travel to Phillips Academy to use Morse Stairs for resistance training

After assessing the quality of BKH tryouts, George W Bush has decided to take a PG year and return to his status as head cheerleader

Freshman JV Hockey player announces plans to grow a “playoff beard”

Morse basement examined for allergens or irritants that may cause red eyes