12:00 p.m.: Wake up, get my bread up. Birds are chirping, the sun is shining, I will take on the world today!
12:05 p.m.: I hear the sweet sound of keys jingling! Due to my sleep schedule, the custodian and I are on a first name basis now.
12:45 p.m.: After 30 minutes, I emerge from the bathroom in a cloud of smoke.
1:30 p.m.: Trade options on Robinhood using my dad’s money.
1:35 p.m.: Make the long walk to the Chapel for Baseball and Philosophy class
1:45 p.m.: After ten minutes of wiffle ball, we’re released to mob the lawn.
2:00 p.m.: Catcall Freshman that are walking too close to the spikeball net I stole from Borden.
4:20 p.m.: Hang out at WPAA headquarters.
4:25 p.m.: Uh-oh! Morse alarm went off again.
4:45 p.m.: Open laptop, uninstall Canvas.
5:00 p.m.: Wake up again, fell asleep writing a letter of continued interest to Cape Cod Community College.
5:30 p.m.: Take care of some business and order Doordash.
6:00 p.m.: Call home (need money for Porsche).
6:01 p.m.: Finally hung up with those hooligans. Thankfully, I only have to call once a week.
6:10 p.m.: Scream obscenities in a Call of Duty lobby for a few hours.
8:10 p.m.: Play online poker until failure.
12:10 a.m.: Decline calls from loved ones and fall asleep listening to Alex Jones podcast.
