Sykes Wellness Center Receives 400
Visits for “Ear Pain” Following the
Release of KSI’s New Single.
Campus Saved After Dr. Kington
Awards Beyonce With Honors at
ASM.
Student Asks “Chat, is this rizz?” After
Recieving College Promotional Email
Physics 552 Students Discovered
“Torquing their peanits” Using the
“right hand rule” in the Gelb Second
Floor All Gender Bathrooms.
Senior Cruise Makes Halloween
Dance Seem like Paradise
Student Applies for IP in Finger
Painting; Gets Accepted Over Award
Winning Sculpter
Upper Disappears After Complaining
to Seniors About College Applications
Post PSAT
