The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Week’s Top Headlines

Boys Lacrosse Practice Mistook for Eminem Look Alike Convention 

VPN Sales Up 735 Percent Following Hub Restrictions Across the Country

Academy States Unruly Freshman Must Be “Cleansed”

Deerfield Students Shocked to Discover that Andover Values Diversity. 

Kate Middleton Spotted in the PLC Using Adobe Photoshop

Head of School Approval Ratings Come Out, Almost Tie Dick Cheney

Escaped Gelb Bird Returns After Being Tailed by F-18