The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Exeter’s Top Headlines

Mark Zuckerberg Tears ACL: Vigil Held For Famous Alumn’s Lost Ligament

Exeter Converts Library Into Halfway House for Former Inmates, Head Librarian Says “They’ll Feel Right at Home”

Exeter Teacher Featured on New Hit Series “To Catch a Predator”

Students Reclaim Church Basement as Favorite Consensual Hookup Spot

Exeter Student Kisses Girl! Yowza!

Exeter Students Kidnap David Fincher After Finding Out Part of “The Social Network” Was Filmed at Andover

Exeter Student Discovers Vagina For the First Time – Male Students Predicted to Follow Suit Sometime in the Next Decade

Student Accused of Using AI Turns Out to Be AI-PoweredAI-Powered Humanoid

Once Again, Students Protest Implementation Of Sex-Ed Curriculum, Stating There Is No Need For One and This Time Could Be Spent Studying

All-School Meeting Said to Be Highlight of Entire Student Body’s Week