The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Watch out for the Deans at Prom

Maggie Satterthwaite and Joey Zheng 

26 is a fundamental player

Grade: Besties


Thomas White, Trevor Grady, and Colby Duggan

Future professional athletes. And Thomas White 😉

Grade: Stay tuned for July 9


Ruby Flaherty and Ben Garozzo

Workplace relationship

Grade: Boys Varsity Lacrosse


Carson Cormier and Sofia Traversari

Athlete and former athlete

Grade: Twin towers


Hope Nardone and Simon Kane

One plays basketball, one is on the team

Grade: Slam dunk


Allie Chung and Gio Pagliuca

Average intelligence and equal intelligence

Grade: Destined to be together 

Keira Reidy and Reid Malatesta 

Sorry about the Bruins 🙁

Grade: Boston sports


Alanna Olsen and Sam Rodgers 

True love doesn’t exist

Grade: GVS budget


Kylie Buckley and Daniel Rekoske

No one saw this coming 

Grade: Sneakiness 100 


Siobhan Reidy and Nolan Roche 

Shiv Roy and Rodeo Roche

Grade: Oscar-worthy


Ameri Vest and Ryan Chandor

Two true pioneers of diversity 

Grade: CaMD


Ava Sullivan and Bobby Corkery

The person with the fattest ass on campus and Ava Sullivan 

Grade: Belaz 75710 Ultra Class Haul Truck


Nishani Clarke and Andy Barton

Representing “Youth From Every Quarter” 

Grade: Wiz Khalifa Lovers


Javeon Talbot and Thomas O’Brien

Committed, to each other

Grade: Better than football record


Julia Montgomery and Chris Rey

Subtlety at its finest

Grade: Brainpower


Aidan Fenton and Lulu Rourke  

Max Verstappen might make an appearance 

Grade: Pole position 


Kelly Bu and Jaeyong Shim 

Washed-up blue key head and blue key head wannabe



Ethan Qi and Mia Xiao 

Musty newsroom incoming?

Grade: U/M


Elyse Goncalves and Joe Murphy 

Going “as friends”

Grade: Afternoon Delight