The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Week’s Top Headlines

Affinity Group on Campus Created by Students Who Did Not Go Skiing Over Break

WTH: Pubic Health, Dr. Patel? Guess We Are the School of the Bushes

Further Investigation Reveals Barbeque Sauce Prank Done by Extremely Confused DoorDash Driver

To Foster Political Diversity, OWHL Aims to Hire One Non-Communist Librarian by 2030

TCU Just Glad They Don’t Play Deerfield in Lacrosse

George Santos to Speak at ASM for Mixed Heritage Awareness Month

Harry’s Virginity Story Subtle Hint to Meghan About What He Really Likes

Trade School Interest Rises Among Uppers Following CCO Survey