The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Overheard on The Paths

“You can never have too many bestiality jokes.”

“It looks like my collection of Commons plates might be drawing some attention.”

“It’s not lying, it’s just creativity.”

“In retrospect, my Walter White costume might’ve been too realistic for the Deans. I probably didn’t need all that meth.”

“Colleges can see that.”

“¿Señora, como se dice ‘YOLO?’”

“Why does this pumpkin only have one singular hole in it?”

“He isn’t that bad looking… he just needs the gym, plastic surgery, maybe reincarnation.”

“Would a squirrel be a good substitute for a rat?”