The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Week’s Top Headlines

Op-Ed: Chemistry Teachers Need to be More Conscious of JV Lacrosse Schedules

The Lakers are to Not Making the Playoffs as Middle School Valedictorians are to Getting Rejected from Harvard

My Boyfriend Loves Steph Curry More Than He Loves Me But I Never Knew He Liked Indian Food

Golf Team Protests Subpar New England Course Conditions: “This is Galaxies Away From Trump National Jupiter!”

Collective Campus Stink Intensifies as Dorms Take Drastic Measures to Win Green Cup Challenge

Ms. Fenton’s Dogs Single-Pawedly Put Ultimate Frisbee to Shame

Popular Reddit Community for Golfer Calf Porn Increases Following

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