The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Week’s Top Headlines

Bio-100 Student Dismissed From Class After Saying Reproduction was the Hardest Unit


News Down One Editor, Who Will Report on the ASM We All Already Watched?


Rockwell Kids Exposed For All The Weird Stuff They Do


New Students Finally Learn Rules Of Commons After Sitting in The Bathroom Every Meal Since September


Due To The Wet, Cold, and Windy Climate, Gelb Second Floor Bathroom Uses Reach Term High 


Progressive Learning Environment? Group Of Students Outside Of Bartlett Silenced Once Again


Reports Show, Overhead Senior Cruise Dance Floor Photos Increase “Fun Appearance” by 73 percent