The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: The Week’s Top Headlines

Aerial Footage Shows PAPS Officers Ignore Townies on the Track But Stop Jaywalking Students

Survey Reveals Majority of Seniors Would Willingly Get Covid-19 in Exchange for Ivy Admission

Administration Announces Students Caught Without Lanyard Will Be Put in the Stocks

The Phillipian Is Grasping at Straws With These Online Issues, Experts Say