“What? Oh, sorry, I was looking at myself.”
“Whoever just private chatted me an eggplant and a person kneeling, how did you know I like to garden?”
“I wasn’t looking at my phone, my aunt just stabbed herself in the living room.”
“Some of my other students have been telling me to listen to a new song called ‘WAP,’ would you recommend it?”
“*ping!* My bad guys, my divorce lawyer is emailing me off the hook these days.”
“Can you guys see my screen? No? Well, I guess I should just completely change the entire class plan and not ask one of my many computer literate students how to fix this simple issue.”
“Oh, darn it. I spilled coffee liqueur all over my papers.”
