Two Fridays ago, I sat in the Chapel eagerly watching the big presidential debate. By the time Q&A rolled around, I was completely invested in both parties. When Chloe and Alfonso expressed the student body’s concern that community suppers were too restrictive, like ASM-assigned seating, it brought to my attention the fact that Minnie and David’s dinner idea brings much uncertainty to Andover. For me, the idea always seemed like a great way for people to socialize and meet others. However, many classmates believe it’s old-fashioned, intimidating, too much work, and most of all, that it’s simply better to just eat dinner with familiar friends. While I agree there are many things that must be sorted out for these suppers to work, my own biggest concern is people’s misunderstandings and fears of a night that’s meant simply for fun and community building.
Community suppers are formal dinners occurring once or twice a term. The concept is that seating will be assigned and randomized, giving students opportunities to engage with people they would never have before. Additionally, a faculty member would be assigned to each table to help facilitate and guide conversations between students. Minnie and David strive for a sophisticated vibe featuring white clothed tables and perhaps even waiters. An idea like this is most likely unfamiliar to a lot of Andover students and faculty, many harboring concerns of sitting with unfamiliar individuals instead of close friends. Realistically speaking, I imagine I would be pretty nervous sharing a meal with unacquainted classmates. How intimidating would it be for a freshman to sit with uppers and seniors, when even a lowerclassman daring to step foot in lower right is a death sentence? Still, even the “fresh meat” of the school have been here long enough to know anyone you’ll meet is open-minded and friendly. And one of Andover’s biggest values — community — cannot possibly be achieved if students are scared to share a meal with each other.
Another potential concern is the fact that community suppers seem to limit freedom. However, community suppers are completely optional. If you want to attend, then great, and if not, that’s perfectly fine too. Community suppers aren’t something to stress over, but something to look forward to, a source of “community” like the title suggests. It’s also one less night I have to worry about who I’m going to eat dinner with. The worst thing is coming back from sports or practice and finding out my friends have already eaten dinner. Community supper fixes this problem that I’m sure many people have had. Additionally, it can even be a source of excitement or an event people can look forward to. Who wouldn’t love a fancier vibe in Commons, being served food like in a restaurant, and even dressing up or getting ready with friends? Perhaps the idea of a more formal setting is intimidating, but one thing to keep in mind is that it really is just meant to be a fun, chill way to meet others.
Others might say it just seems too hard to organize. After all, we’ve never had anything like this before. What about costs and organizing these dinners? Who’s going to wait tables? How will seating be arranged? There are currently a lot of doubts, but community and formal suppers is an idea that’s worked for generations across the nation. Many boarding schools have them, such as Deerfield, St. Paul’s, Groton, and Brewster. However, their suppers are mandatory and occur weekly. When compared to these schools, Andover’s potential community dinners already sound much better. However, one lingering problem still persists. What’s to say people will actually show up if it’s optional? Although community suppers are not mandatory, considering some students’ busy schedules or shy nature, I believe many students will still attend, purely out of faith in our school’s non sibi spirit. We are all capable of getting outside our comfort zones and showing up, but I fear some are unwilling to give it a try.
Although I know it’s an idea that’s not for everyone, I believe Andover’s students value community and friendships. No matter who you might be sitting with, everyone is welcoming and kind. As the saying “you never know until you try it” goes, maybe even try it once before you decide whether you like it or not. And who knows, maybe just by attending a single dinner you can meet your future best friend or spouse?
