The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Exeter Trendwatch

Skunk Hair

Bleaching the two front strips of your hair is the new hot way to achieve the cool and edgy tik tok aesthetic! It’s time to grow out those barcode bangs you’ve kept from middle school and let go of your math olympiad kid aesthetic because well…it isn’t cool anymore. Charli D’amelio was seen with bleached hair strips not too long ago and she’s everything us Exonians aspire to be: rich, slightly problematic, and most importantly, NOT nerdy…except in the sexy-blue-light glasses way. Time to crack open that hair manic-panic dye kit and emulate that skunk hair because us Exonians stink in style.

Adidas Superstars

Are you tired of twinning with the entire Gen Z with your Air Force 1’s? Sick of being rich-shamed for wearing Golden Gooses? No longer feeling edgy enough for Doc Martens? Adidas Superstars are the shoes for you, especially if you missed this trend during middle school because your mom only let you wear loafers. Exonians are truly superstars. We have Saturday classes and our football team is still undefeated….at losing! Now you try and find a more well-rounded, multi-talented student body. The three stripes on the side of the shoe even represent the three most essential aspects of an Exeter student: Exceptional, Educated, and Entitled.