The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Overheard on the Paths

“You give me lots of Cascada vibes.”

“Pretty positive shin splints are just for when the trainers have no clue what’s actually wrong.”

“Maybe a funny accent could be the change my counselor says I need.”

“Yeah, my parents forgot to pick me up so I just stayed here… What’d you do for break?”

“My Nana told me I’m getting taller–do you think it’s true?”

“Sleep deprivation? I don’t like being put in boxes, Georgina.”

“See, the difference is that I actually took my SAT.”

“Luv u tons xx.”

“#sayyestoandover, but don’t forget to sign the mandatory NDA, first.”