“My dorm is under investigation for a hidden computer recording dialogue between house counselors”
“Dum-dum says What?”
“I sure do hope the winter squash crop survives with all these fluctuating temperatures”
“My teacher rejected my lunch invite on evite”
“Breaking toothpicks helps me control the unquenchable rage I feel most days”
“I told him! I said, ‘If you want the ultimate stock return on your investment, you’re gonna need to stop choosing based on which broker schmoozes you best that day.’”