The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: Non Sibi Weekend

Dear Student Body (copy to adults),

Below is a list of the various activities scheduled for this year’s Non Sibi Weekend. Please sign up, remaining mindful of any potential athletic conflicts you might have. Skipping your Non Sibi Project will result in three cuts. Kind of ridiculous that some of you lazy elitists wouldn’t show up, huh? Pretzels and turkey sandwiches will be provided.

Love,

The Community Engagement Office