10. At least he didn’t die old…
9. Heaven just couldn’t wait to have them!
8. Let’s be honest: the world’s a better place without him.
7. Be strong, you bleary-eyed wimp.
6. She’s got to be in a better place. Don’t you remember her pigsty of an apartment?!?!
5. Ten points for Malthus!
4. How about a game of FIFA after the funeral?
3. Well it’s about time! I thought she would live to see 100!
2. Look on the bright side: more inheritance for the rest of us!
1. Hey, now you can be a Features Associate!