During Blue Key Head (BKH) auditions last week, a certain few candidates surprised us all. As they stormed through Lower Right of Paresky Commons, no one could tell if they were a brood of prematurely balding Post-Graduates or a gaggle of guys whose body wash was sneakily infused with blue food dye. Little did the audience know, Blue Man Group had caught wind of the auditions and decided to show Andover just what being blue is all about.
Unsuspecting and apprehensive of the talent they were about to behold, the crowd watched intently. Dazzled by the glitz and glam of three fully-grown, shiny blue men strutting into Paresky, the current Blue Key Heads immediately did away with the tradition of skirts and switched to head-to-toe black. “It’s called class,” said Chayre Layder ’13, former BKH.
Each aspect of the mens’ audition was performed with unrivaled raw power and blue spirit. The group revolutionized the definition of a serenade by straying from the more common path. In lieu of straining their treasured vocal chords, they shook their booties in silence to their signature song, “Shake Your Euphemism.” This provocative dance spurred crowd involvement as onlookers protected by plastic ponchos suddenly found themselves covered in flavored goop.
When asked to lead Lower Right in a cheer, the group took a unique approach and began hitting an arrangement of blue drums in silence to the rhythm of “What do we eat?” The students quickly caught on and the rhythm pulsated through every student’s veins until the whole crowd was screaming “Red meat.” In addition to the drumset, the Paresky staff helped the group acquire a raw slab of meat as a cue card for the end of the cheer, drawing a smile from even the most menacing BKHs.
During the push-up segment of the audition, the blue men formed a most remarkable ensemble. They managed to continue one-armed pushups long enough to make the blue sweat drip off as a true blue tribute to the floor. Their grand finale included dousing a wide-eyed Junior in a fresh coat of blue paint (courtesy of the Art Department) and throwing massive, blue dodge-balls into the crowd which, unfortunately, but not unexpectedly, took out some of Andover’s finest athletes with one blow.
“Woah man. A pair of them came flying right at me. But I didn’t think to run,” stuttered Tarry Fied ’14.
From superhuman strength to silence, the Blue Man Group truly epitomized the spirit of our community. After being chosen unanimously by the former BKHs, the blue men will surely blow our community away. We can be sure to expect great things in the upcoming year, but drumline really has to watch out.