The Eighth Page

Do Your Part To Go Green Because This Guy Isn’t

Q. What are you doing to help in the Green Cup Challenge? A. What is the Green Cup Challenge? Oh, is that why I keep getting those e-mails about conserving energy or whatever? Huh. Well I try to, you know, turn out the lights, but I can’t guarantee anything. Q. What do you do to conserve energy? A. Again, I try to turn out the lights, turn off the TV and turn off the shower when I’m done, but sometimes I can be a bit forgetful. Q. How long is your average shower? A. Like, how long am I in the shower or how long is it on? Q. How long is it on? A. Oh well, probably around 45 to 50 minutes. I really like to get it hot, then I do some other things. I also think the sound of the water hitting the floor is relaxing, so sometimes I just sit in the bathroom and relax. Maybe even bring math homework in there, who knows? Q. What do you do with electronics when you aren’t using them? A. Leave them on, like everybody else. I like to be able to get on my computer without having to wait for the thing to turn on. I usually just leave it running, playing music because then it doesn’t take as long to start when I need to use it. Q. What do you have your heat set for in your room? A. Well the heat is all the way up, but that’s too hot for me so I have my fan on and window open. But sometimes that gets too cold so I also have a humidifier. But sometimes it gets to humid, so I have a de-humidifier too. After all of that it is about 68 degrees. Q. It sounds like you aren’t doing too much to help Andover in the Green Cup Challenge. Will you change anything? A. It really hurts that you think that. I’ll have you know that I was in a hurry and took a quick a 30 minute shower the other day. And I am not changing anything. I like everything the way it is and global warming is a myth. Q. Okay well they have pretty convincing proof that global warming is not a myth. Does that change your view? A. NO! Global warming is a conspiracy theory conjured by Toyota to spur Prius sales. Q. Okay, well this was a very interesting conversation. Thank you for your time. -Andrew Wilson