The Eighth Page

Arts

The Arts section is expected to attract more readers than ever with a spry, vivacious new group of editors. Chris Li ’07 and Jess White ’07 have pledged to devote every waking moment of their lives to their passion for the arts. Chris Li is most famous for his cameo in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon in which he played the horse ridden by Chow Yun-Fat. Chris has also acted in several Broadway musicals, such as Cats and Fiddler on the Roof. The pinnacle of his career in thespian arts was playing the role of Liu Kang, in the straight to DVD hit, Mortal Combat Pi. Chris’ partner in crime, Jess White, is wanted in over 30 states for illegally breeding genetically enhanced race horses. Jess is expected to add several new things to the layout of the section, included a subliminal messaging area, where she will articulate her theories and beliefs in order to build a following strong enough overthrow the American government. When combined, the two are expected to generate enough positive energy to rival that of every roller coaster in the world combined. When asked what Arts is planning to report on in the following weeks, they responded with a plethora of answers. Of the many uttered, I was particularlywowed by the dance recital choreographed by Peter Dignard ’07 and the soon to be famous Clown Suit Monologue performed by Dan Gabel ’06. In addition to this riveting coverage, the Arts section has pledged to use new half-page photos to entice the reader to the five words of text below. May the golden god Zeus bless the Arts section with a bountiful and glorious year.