Disclaimer: All of the dialogue in the following article was really spoken by the precociously articulate Jordy Fenton ’16. The Phillipian and I would like to thank her for the time she spent answering our rapid fire questions and for the sunny air she lends to the Day Hall atmosphere. I live with her. I play with her. I see her once or twice a week. But do I really know Jordy Fenton? Casey Mixter ’03 and I decided to find out the real story behind this four-year-old woman of mystery, who is the daughter of Director of Athletics and Day Hall House Counselor Martha Fenton. Mac King ’05 begged us to take him along on our journey; his desire, we believe, was not to find out the truth behind Jordy but to infiltrate Day Hall and… and … and we’ll hear more about that in a less innocent article. For the record, Jordyn lives in the Fentons’ apartment in Day Hall with about 30 upperclass girls. She has lived at Phillips Academy her whole life. Currently, she gets big kicks out of spelling words. On behalf of the weekly Features Faculty Child Profile, we approached Jordy and offered that eager little munchkin some candy in exchange for her full cooperation and free use of her toys until she turns 18. The following dialogue ensued. Jenny Wong: Jordy, what is your name? Jordy Fenton: Jordyn. J-o-r-d-y-n. J-o-r-d-y-n. JW: How old are you? JF: 4 years-old. JW: Do you like living in Day Hall? JF: Mmm-hmmm. JW: What is your favorite part about it? JF: Being with my friends. We have fun, fun, fun. JW: What do you want to be when you grow up? JF: I want to be like my mama. I’m not gonna marry anybody. I’m just gonna stay with my mom and my dad and my sister. JW: Do you not like boys? JF: No. I have some boyfriends. But [once there were] two boys and one girl and one time when I was three years-old they chased me. And I cried when they pushed me down. [They were] my friends named Elliot, Kira, and Jakey-Bobo. Jordan then commenced to run around in circles; she eventually found her way into my bedroom. JW: Whatcha doin’ in there, Jord? JF: Looking at cars. After corralling her back outside, the interview continued. JW: What’s your favorite animal, Jordy? JF: A horsie! JW: Why do you like horsies? JF: Because they are my favorite. JW: Jordy, tell me a funny story. JF: Um, one time a bear loved a girl. Then the bear took her to his home. He lived in a cold, cold, cold cave. It wasn’t even a polar bear, it was just a…..bear. JW: What was the most exciting thing that has ever happened to you? JF: Umm… I love petting horses. JW: What’s your favorite color? JF: Pink! Pink and purple. JW: Why do you like pink and purple? JF: Because they are my favorite colors. JW: What’s your favorite holiday? JF: Halloween. JW: What were you last Halloween? JF: I was a chicken. JW: Do you like surprises? JF: Yea. JW: What was the best surprise you ever got? JF: Umm, Barbie. JW: Which Barbie? JF: Scoobie-Doo Barbie. JW: What is your favorite toy? JF: Barbie. B-e-b (an attempt to spell b-a-r-b-i-e) . JW: B-e-b. Anymore? JF: That’s it. JW: Barrrrrrrbie? JF: R! JW: Tell me about your little sister. JF: She takes stuff from me. JW: How old is she? JF: 1 years-old. JW: You were laughing at that picture of the moose [on the wall] earlier; what was so funny about it? JF: I can hear it talking! JW: What is that moose’s name? JF: MOOSIE! JW: Tell me about your best friend. JF: Maddie. Maddie Murphy. She likes my stuff. After a brief silence, Jordyn breaks into song. JF: “No matter what I do, all I think about is you……” JW: Jord! What song is that? JF: It’s the number three song! Song number three on my CD. (Stole by Nelly and Former Destiny’s Child Member Kelly Rowland). During the entire interview, Jordyn had been making moustaches out of paper for Casey, Mac, and me. We give her a piece of candy for her efforts. She, in return, jumped for us. JW: Don’t jump with candy in your mouth, you might choke. Chew and swallow. Jordy. Jordyn moved over to hug Casey’s leg and stayed there for almost a minute. She then embraced Mac’s leg. Jenny felt lonely. JF: I want to make a moustache for my daddy. JW: What about your mommy? JF: No! My mommy doesn’t wear moustaches. And with such eloquent parting words, Jordyn ran home.