The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: New Proposed Amendments To The 2018-2019 Blue Book

– New parietal rule: no one is allowed in your room. Ever. Friends aren’t allowed in your room. Your roommate isn’t allowed in your room. House counselors aren’t allowed in your room. You aren’t even allowed in your room. Except between the hours of 6:00 p.m. and 6:23 p.m. on Friday.

– Independent, nonprofit, bottom-up organizations dedicated to fostering a sense of appreciation and awareness for horticulture are STRICTLY prohibited.

– Under no circumstances may any student coat themselves in coconut oil and streak during Andover/Exeter Weekend.