The semi-formal dance is up there on the list of great high school traditions. At such events, girls and boys get together to eat nice food, wear nice clothes and generally have a nice time, or so I once believed. It was with these idyllic stereotypes of high school events that I naïvely walked into the Sadie Hawkins dance in November of my freshman year. I was excited to be going to a real dance and eagerly anticipated the good wholesome fun in store for me. Looking back, all I can say is: yeah, right. I have always held the somewhat romantic notion that semi-formal dances are supposed to be different than the typical sleaze-fests that happen weekly in the Ryley Room, but unfortunately they are not. The same music is played. Grinding is still the norm. In all honesty, the only thing that is different is the clothes, and the fact that most people have committed themselves to one person for the night, instead of the usual promiscuity that characterizes most other dances. Why is this, I wonder? Why pluck up the courage to ask your crush to a dance, spend the money on a nice dress, buy tickets, and go only to find yourself in the same mosh pit of sexuality that you can get on any other weekend for none of the extra effort? With this year’s Sadie Hawkins dance approaching fast, these questions are starting to circulate in my mind again, along with thoughts about what I would like to see change on semi-formal night. The key word is “variety.” A semi-formal should be special, and yet we have turned it into another excuse to bump and grind on a Saturday night. I do not place fault on the Student Activities office for the relative uniformity of school dances. Mrs. Efinger and the Student Activities Board have the weekly challenge of coming up with fun events for our Saturday nights that will appeal to our entire student population, which is no small feat in itself. With such a large student body, it is impossible to please everyone; therefore, the best option for the Office is to go with what the majority vote dictates. In the world of school dances, semi-formal or otherwise, this vote is usually for hip-hop and grinding. When the SAB tried to deviate from this norm by playing different music at dances (or by offering alternatively-themed dances, such as the swing dance or the 80’s dance), the response from students has been overwhelmingly against the switch. According to Mrs. Efinger, she received many complaints after the first dance of this year, the Video Dance, some of which said that the variety in the music played had made the dance seem like a “bat mitzvah.” If we want any kind of change to happen at all, we need to say so and be the ones to make it happen. Note: if you like grinding and are completely comfortable with it, great. That is your right. But it is not my cup of tea, and I know I am not alone. Judging by the sea of undulating couples sprinkling the dance floor on any given Saturday night in Ryley, you might say I am in the minority, and yet I cannot help but wonder if my views are representative of far more of the student body than you might expect. At dances, I have seen girls grinding the whole night, and later talked to them, only to discover that they actually hate grinding, and in many cases, did not even know the guy they were dancing with. Then why do we do it? Do we want to rebel against the “golden kid” standards that are far too often placed on us academically, athletically and socially? Do we think that getting up close and personal with someone we barely know will somehow alleviate other stresses of our PA lives? If that is the case, then we’re given the opportunity to do so at every other dance of every year. But for the sake of preserving the sanctity of the semi-formal, I believe it is crucial to hold on to a little bit of formality for three nights a year. And even beyond those semi-formals that are few and far between, maybe it is time for us to take a good look at what we are willing to put out there every weekend on the dance floor. So what about the semi-formals? I don’t know about you, but I want to get dressed up. I want to go out for dinner with a typical “nice guy.” And even though I like Top 40 hits as much as the next person, I want the DJ to play songs that I can actually dance to—and when I say dance, I do not mean grind. So here is what I propose: at any given semi-formal, we students should ask the DJ to play two styles of music equally: your usual Top 40 hits, and stuff you might not normally hear at dances, which could include anything from swing-style songs from the big bands of the Jazz era to classic Elvis or early Madonna (“Crazy for You”, anyone?). Dare I even mention classical, salsa, or traditional music from other cultures? That way, both grinders and non-grinders alike could be satisfied. And who knows? Maybe those students who usually shy away from dances because they do not like the typical overt sexuality of the dancing would take a risk and come out for the night because they can hear something other than “Crank That” blasting from Commons. We owe that much to the members of our community who may want more from their weekend than a clothed quickie on the dance floor. At Andover, we pride ourselves on being a diverse group of people who can supposedly live, study, eat and compete as a multifaceted whole, while still remaining open to different viewpoints and willing to try new things. Let’s see if we can party that way, too.
