The Eighth Page

The Eighth Page

Mad Knowledge

For those of you who don’t know me, it may be hard to tell that I possess a 6.2 cumulative grade point average. That means that I get all sixes, and at least one seven each term, and spend a total of 23 minutes a week away from my homework. But you don’t really have…

The Eighth Page

World Annihilation

It has recently come to my attention that the United States has been waging a war against the Middle Eastern power of Iraq for the past month or so. While listening to Billy Joel’s “Oh, What a Night,” I began to contemplate the President’s motives for such a war. How much would such a campaign…

The Eighth Page

Duck & Cover

The hollow echoes of gunshots resound in my ears, and through the dense underbrush I spot a group of angry-looking males. Dressed in camouflage, the men creep through the foliage. Wielding sleek firearms, they glare menacingly. Before I know it, I am staring past one of the sinister-looking guns and into a pair of cold…

The Eighth Page

Back from the Dead: Mc Garvery Does Winter Term

It’s the time of year when layers of clothing are shed like layers of unnecessary flab and it seems like that homicidally depressed senior you know is finally beginning to smile (eh, maybe it’s just the Valium). Yes boys and girls, spring is here. Here in the upper limits of the American north, we’ve withstood…

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