The Eighth Page

The Eighth Page

Igor Dennis

To start out this week’s advice column, Igor would like to address a question to the student population as opposed to the other way around. Dear students, I, Igor, have encountered a problem in my life. It seems that although I have dedicated my life to entertaining all of you, my audience, it does not…

The Eighth Page

Fabulous Fasions

The commencement of spring is, I feel, more easily recognizable than that of any other season. Walking around the picturesque, tree-lined pathways of Academy Hill, it is difficult not to feel the spring air infesting your soul like the Spirit of the embittered Ghost of Christmas Past, who is angry because spring is his slow…

The Eighth Page

Dear Igor

On very special occasions, Zeus wields his holy lightning bolt and comes down to Earth searching for the next big new thing. Zeus has made his divine intervention and decided that a really really funny advice article is exactly what Features needs. So without further ado, I announce the grand opening of “Ask Igor!” “Ask…

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You Got Housed

My favorite time of year here on Academy Hill is when people start talking about housing. The dorm you live in is a major part of your life at Andover, and every year students have to make the tough decision of which dorms they will call home. Actually, they don’t make the decisions. The decisions…

The Eighth Page

All The President’s Delivery Men

In hitting the campaign trail, I learned three things: 1. People love novelty buttons, especially if they feature my chubby face. 2. People love golf pencils, especially if they have my name on them. 3. People love me. Conscience speaking: Daniel, you are being an idiot; don’t get a big head about this whole presidency…

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