The Eighth Page

The Eighth Page

Quad Day: Taylor Kisses and Tells

Traditionally, Quad Day has been a joyous, lighthearted celebration, providing the entire PA community with an opportunity to start the year off well. However, that all changed last September, when the Taylor Kissing Booth, a recent Quad Day tradition, became the source of a massive outbreak of an orally transmitted infection that devastated not only…

The Eighth Page

Choose Your Own Adventure: College Edition

One morning, a little girl or boy (this is you!) woke up to start another stress-free day up on Andover Hill. Something was nagging your little clever mind, however. Suddenly you remember: “I had almost forgotten,” you exclaimed. “I am already two weeks into my freshman year. Someone told me by now I should have…

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Welcome to the Big House

Here at Andover, anyone will tell you that the most important thing you can focus on is organization. Moving into your dorm room is no exception. For those day students out there, this article will be useless to you. [Editor’s Note: These people have cars now so you should be nicer to them, jerk.] Nevertheless,…

The Eighth Page

Monkey Magic: 2004 Predictions

My fellow students, welcome back for what is sure to be another great school year! For those of you who have yet to experience what the French call “Le Boarding School,” let me start off your journey at Academy Hill with a sonnet I have entitled “Sweet Nothings”: Uday and Qusay, you two always were…

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Queen of the Robots

The other day I was in the PACC, and I realized that I am technologically challenged. The first hint of my incompetence was when I realized I forgot my ID card. Thinking that I was indeed a cunning little fox, I took a piece of cardboard and held it up to the bleepy thing. I…

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