The Eighth Page

The Eighth Page

Choose Your Own Adventure: College Edition

One morning, a little girl or boy (this is you!) woke up to start another stress-free day up on Andover Hill. Something was nagging your little clever mind, however. Suddenly you remember: “I had almost forgotten,” you exclaimed. “I am already two weeks into my freshman year. Someone told me by now I should have…

The Eighth Page

Welcome to the Big House

Here at Andover, anyone will tell you that the most important thing you can focus on is organization. Moving into your dorm room is no exception. For those day students out there, this article will be useless to you. [Editor’s Note: These people have cars now so you should be nicer to them, jerk.] Nevertheless,…

The Eighth Page

Monkey Magic: 2004 Predictions

My fellow students, welcome back for what is sure to be another great school year! For those of you who have yet to experience what the French call “Le Boarding School,” let me start off your journey at Academy Hill with a sonnet I have entitled “Sweet Nothings”: Uday and Qusay, you two always were…

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Queen of the Robots

The other day I was in the PACC, and I realized that I am technologically challenged. The first hint of my incompetence was when I realized I forgot my ID card. Thinking that I was indeed a cunning little fox, I took a piece of cardboard and held it up to the bleepy thing. I…

The Eighth Page

The Mape 5000: Here to Revolutionize Your Life

At this school, almost everybody is revered for some type of creativity or talent that he or she possesses. Some of us are great writers (although I don’t personally know any), some of us are artists, some of us play instruments, and still others make phallic statues on the Great Lawn. But none of these…

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