The Eighth Page

Phillipian Satire: The Week’s Top Headlines

  • Sykes Declares State of Emergency After Senioritis Outbreak. And Syphilis.
  • Student Falls Into Tiger Pit in Front of PAPS Headquarters.
  • Local Caravan of Vagabonds Set Up Camp and Bewitch Andover.
  • Administration Bans Apple Products After Steve Jobs Doesn’t Respond to Request to Speak on Campus.
Mar 23, 2018