The Eighth Page

The Eighth Page Presents: The Week’s Top Headlines

Extra Security Hired in Anticipation of Hoards Expected To Arrive at Annual Lip Sync Battle

Sober, Bad Dancer Breathalyzed at Battle of the DJs

Palfrey Accidentally Reveals during Interview that Next Month’s ASM Speaker Will Be P. Diddy

Local Elderly Population Misinterprets “Senior Concert,” Begrudgingly Leave the Stage

Midterm Marks the Apex of “High School Diploma,
Necessary?” Google Searches

Jan 26, 2018