The Eighth Page

Features — Phillipian Satire: Top 10 Things Your Parents Said Over Parents Weekend

10. This foliage is just what I paid for!

9. Commons is just FANTASTIC!

8. We need to talk about the birds and the bees…

7. Let me fill you in on the presidential election!

6. Your mother and I are happy wherever you go to college.

5. Are you getting at least nine hours of sleep?

4. Why are you the way that you are?

3. Where’s my Phillipian subscription?

2. Actually, honey, it’s “my roommate and I.”

1. Sorry we can’t make it to Family Weekend, our secretary is going instead.

Nov 4, 2016