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Philosophy at Andover

Communism- When you work ten hours on a group project while your partner does nothing, and you both receive a 5.

Existentialism- When you question the meaning of life after pulling an all-nighter for your essay that has 36 words, including the title.

Masochism- When a teacher slams you with consistent 2s and you are too lazy to switch out.

Tyrannism – When you frantically throw everything into your closet because you think your hear the fire inspector’s footsteps.

Altruism – When your history teacher gives you extension after extension in order for you to watch Netflix in bed.

Anarchism – No initial sign-in for Seniors.

Aestheticism – When you work really hard on decorating your final project because the actual content is crap beyond repair.

Atheism – When you don’t believe in a higher power (you’ll usually change your mind when you meet said higher power in a DC).

Capitalism – When the Den can charge whatever it wants, because no one is willing to make the trip downtown to CVS.

Darwinism – Wearing a Varsity jacket at the top of the food chain.

Absurdism – Bio 600.

Individualism – Doesn’t exist at Andover.

Materialism – When you realize your life is over after losing your calculator the night before the ACT.

Totalitarianism – When the House Counselors want you to keep your doors open 90° so they can regulate your sex life.

Sep 25, 2015